28th March 2015
by Tanya Sweeney
What is a BDSM – bondage, discipline, submission and masochism – lifestyle?
(Roll down for article)
When Graham Dwyer’s defence counsel Remy Farrell observed there were many “unique features” to his client’s murder trial, he was perhaps understating the case somewhat.
Certainly, for many Irish people, the trial is the first time they’re likely to have encountered widespread talk of knife-play, dominants, submissives, slaves and sites such as alt.com.
The trial heard there are many users of such sites, which begs the question of how large the BDSM (bondage, discipline, submission and masochism) community is in Ireland and what those users get from their participation in the scene.
Speak to those involved and they will tell you that the very cornerstones of the BDSM scene are trust and respect between adults who are consenting to certain sex acts.
Pain inflicted during these interactions is not the end goal: rather, exploring the edges of one’s sexuality is. More->
BDSM community fear they will be demonised
rom the beginning, it was apparent this was a court case like no other.
The jury was informed on the first day that “acts of stabbing” were an “essential part” of Graham Dwyer and Elaine O’Hara’s sexual relationship.
For many, “knife play” and “blood play” were foreign terms.
It seemed surprising such an extreme sexual sub-culture could exist in Ireland.
Bondage and sadomasochism are not common terms in the eminently respectable suburbs of Blackrock and Foxrock.
But as details of the trial emerged, it became apparent a thriving Irish BDSM (Bondage, Dominance and Submission, and Sadomasochism) community existed. More ->
An oasis of consent: My experience at Dublin’s fetish club night
LOOKING AROUND AT signs reminding patrons that ‘No means No’, I thought how wonderful it would be to have these on the walls of every club.
They were a reminder of the frequent instances of being groped by men I’d never set eyes on before and of – usually – being branded a “moody b***h” for protesting.
And here I was, dressed in fishnet stockings, a short leather skirt and a barely-there bodice, surrounded by people in similar states of undress and I couldn’t have felt more comfortable.
It was my first time at Nimhneach, Dublin’s fetish club night – and it won’t be my last. More ->